The American government is about as close to shutting down as it has been since the mid 90s.
For all of those non-Americans that don't watch The West Wing as well as the government flunkies that so frequently go upon this blog, let me give you the quickest run down I can.
Basically, the republicans and democrats of the intelligent Socratic society we call congress are disagreeing and are unwilling to compromise enough to fix the problem. The disagreement is over the second least sexy political issue (only after taxes), healthcare. But we're about to hit the debt ceiling aswell which is fun.
If they can not reach an agreement within the hour, the government will shutdown. When that happens, the government is defunded and can not pay for a lot of stuff except for a fewselect things. And everyone that works for the government is unofficially fired (until it reboots). It will probably take a couple of days to start up again, but I'm still flipping out.
If I die, tell Obama his hair looked especially funny today on C-Span.
There are 45 minutes left.
I'll see you on the other side.
Monday, September 30, 2013
Sunday, July 28, 2013
I Think I Might be Part-Hermit
While Libbie's apparently been away at her month-long camp, I've been achieving great things, like watching old(ish) movies and reading a bunch of books. I'm certainly 'living the life' (of a hermit). Regardless, I also got the chance to start Doctor Who, and I have a feeling a certain someone who also posts on this blog will be pleased to hear that. (Three seasons in four days, Libbie. I'm going mad.)
Considering that we haven't yet heard back from Libbie, let's all assume she's being held captive by aliens that live in MI. (I can't remember what state that is, for shame.) So, instead, let's chat about summer homework.
Summer homework is a treacherously terrible thing that I've recently been introduced to. I've actually not got much, compared to a few of my friends. (One of them is taking a two-year course in high school, so she's got a number of full papers due first day of school.) Still, doing three different maps of Europe's been driving me a little batty, and I now know more about the society in the time between the fall of the Roman Empire and the Renaissance than I ever really cared to know.
Of course, I'm not suffering alone. There's a good forty or so other kids being driven up numerous walls by European maps and the Holy Roman Empire in my school, too. Misery does love its company.
Just like Libbie, my life this summer's been relatively boring as well. So, I see your adorable kitten and raise you a baby hedgehog.
Considering that we haven't yet heard back from Libbie, let's all assume she's being held captive by aliens that live in MI. (I can't remember what state that is, for shame.) So, instead, let's chat about summer homework.
Summer homework is a treacherously terrible thing that I've recently been introduced to. I've actually not got much, compared to a few of my friends. (One of them is taking a two-year course in high school, so she's got a number of full papers due first day of school.) Still, doing three different maps of Europe's been driving me a little batty, and I now know more about the society in the time between the fall of the Roman Empire and the Renaissance than I ever really cared to know.
Of course, I'm not suffering alone. There's a good forty or so other kids being driven up numerous walls by European maps and the Holy Roman Empire in my school, too. Misery does love its company.
Just like Libbie, my life this summer's been relatively boring as well. So, I see your adorable kitten and raise you a baby hedgehog.
Sunday, July 14, 2013
What about the Vegetable Farmers?
We have this thing in prospering nations called fooditis (that is the official name). Basically we eat things such as meat and oil and it is bad for us and it gives people heart disease and dilates your arteries and cases many different types of cancer.
At least that is what I heard from this documentary called "Forks Over Knives".
In other news . . .
I'm at a month long camp at a University in MI. We're staying in these dorms. I know two people here, my roommate was late, and it is a huge campus. It's a little overwhelming, but I think I'll survive. If you don't here back from me, I probably died (or it was an average month in which I posted once).
I just got back from my grandmother's house.
This has been my life.
Considering how boring it has been, I will leave you with pictures of adorable kittens.
At least that is what I heard from this documentary called "Forks Over Knives".
In other news . . .
I'm at a month long camp at a University in MI. We're staying in these dorms. I know two people here, my roommate was late, and it is a huge campus. It's a little overwhelming, but I think I'll survive. If you don't here back from me, I probably died (or it was an average month in which I posted once).
I just got back from my grandmother's house.
This has been my life.
Considering how boring it has been, I will leave you with pictures of adorable kittens.
An Ode to Pig Farmers
I have something very important to post about today. It's so important, I illustrated it myself.
Today, I would like to bring to your attention a group of people who are often not thought about, yet are critical to the general well-being of the universe: pig farmers.
Pigs are incredibly dirty, stinky, nasty creatures. They look adorable when they're clean, sure, but pigs are never clean.
Of course, pigs also make fabulously delicious food, in forms such as ham, bacon, and the like.
Which means that, in order to get the yummy food, those pig farmers have to put up with those smelly, dirty pigs. I've learned this after having to babysit pigs myself.
Thank you for what you do, pig farmers. Thank you for putting up with pigs so the rest of us don't have to. You're awesome.
Today, I would like to bring to your attention a group of people who are often not thought about, yet are critical to the general well-being of the universe: pig farmers.
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| Why yes, I am an artist. |
Of course, pigs also make fabulously delicious food, in forms such as ham, bacon, and the like.
Thank you for what you do, pig farmers. Thank you for putting up with pigs so the rest of us don't have to. You're awesome.
Friday, June 14, 2013
Abraham Lincoln's Twitter Account
I've been thinking (oh noooo!) about how differently we will be screening for presidents of the future.
With social media and the Internet, what if the Abe Lincoln of tomorrow posted a controversial tweet? What if it comes up during the general election that the candidate was eating ice cream instead of studying for their bio exam because they finally realized that they only live once?
If the requirement will be that no one used social media, never disagreed with anyone, or lived in a log cabin with no wi-fi, how will we ever get a president?
This is kinda weird, and you should remember that it is practically midnight, but an interesting topic none the less.
Exams are over for us (finally) and it's summer vacation! I hope you enjoy it!
With social media and the Internet, what if the Abe Lincoln of tomorrow posted a controversial tweet? What if it comes up during the general election that the candidate was eating ice cream instead of studying for their bio exam because they finally realized that they only live once?
If the requirement will be that no one used social media, never disagreed with anyone, or lived in a log cabin with no wi-fi, how will we ever get a president?
This is kinda weird, and you should remember that it is practically midnight, but an interesting topic none the less.
Exams are over for us (finally) and it's summer vacation! I hope you enjoy it!
Sunday, June 2, 2013
Cats are Secretly Controlling the World
No, really, they are.
Other news! I'm finally getting off my lazy bum and posting. Yay for not procrastinating!
Join me in not procrastinating, my friends! Grab your to-do list and complete one of the tasks on it! Unless its grocery shopping. That can wait.
So can the DMV.
Anyway, I'm certain you're probably expecting some point to show up sooner or later, but it's already been made. Cats are secretly controlling the world. Just think about it. They are clearly smart enough. They know when they're misbehaving, and they do it anyway. They multiply constantly. Not to mention their attitudes! If anything is keeping them from ruling the world, its that every cat is an arrogant hoity-toity kitty that demands their tuna with cream on the side, cooled slightly and with a sprig of catnip on the top.
Watch out, folks. The cats might get you.
Other news! I'm finally getting off my lazy bum and posting. Yay for not procrastinating!
Join me in not procrastinating, my friends! Grab your to-do list and complete one of the tasks on it! Unless its grocery shopping. That can wait.
So can the DMV.
Anyway, I'm certain you're probably expecting some point to show up sooner or later, but it's already been made. Cats are secretly controlling the world. Just think about it. They are clearly smart enough. They know when they're misbehaving, and they do it anyway. They multiply constantly. Not to mention their attitudes! If anything is keeping them from ruling the world, its that every cat is an arrogant hoity-toity kitty that demands their tuna with cream on the side, cooled slightly and with a sprig of catnip on the top.
Watch out, folks. The cats might get you.
Saturday, May 11, 2013
Questions troubling us Today
I am here to answer your top questions that start with the phrase "what is" followed by every letter of the alphabet. Let's start this up!
-What is a short sale
The act of illegally trying to sell a leprechaun or midget.
-What is bmw select
A Russian online service that stands for Buy My Wife.
-What is credit
The ability to buy goods or services because they trust you enough to pay it back.
-What is diabetes
It is when your body is full of elves that constantly need sugar to stay alive.
-What is epilepsy
A neurological disorder usually marked by unconsciousness and seizures.
-What is fracking
A type of dirty dancing not allowed at school sponsored events.
-What is good credit score
When your credit (see above) is good.
-What is Huntington's disease
When you hunt to much, the animals rise up against the power and curse you with Huntington's Disease.
-What is incomplete dominance
When no one actually wears the pants in a relationship.
-What is java
Do you mean the reader or the coffee?
-What is kawasaki disease
Why do you care about all of these diseases?
We are changing the game!
It will now be "Why are"
-Why are leaves green
They are full of chlorophyll and chlorophorme
-Why are my ears hot
There are so my ways that answer could go.
-Why are nuts a heart a heart healthy food
This is just a crazy guess, but I'm going to guess because it's healthy and doesn't clog your cardiovascular system.
-Why are oxygen atoms neutral
Because they have the same number of protons as electrons.
-Why are prions unique
Can anyone actually answer what a "prion" is without googling it?
-Why are quakers called quakers
Because you should be "Quaking before the Lord!".
-Why are red pandas endangered
RED PANDAS ARE REAL!?!
-Why are sloths so slow
You try moving fast with arms like ham bones.
-Why are there no large arthropods
When the elephant sized mice created the universe, they were being persecuted by arthropods that were very large at that time so to punish them, the witch doctor mice decided to forever shrink them.
-Why are unions bad
When did anyone say ever say that unions were bad?
-Why are veins blue
They're not.
-Why are we alive
Why are you asking google for the meaning of life?
-Why are x rays dangerous
The government got the technology from the aliens and you should never trust that the aliens are looking out for our well being.
-Why are you a Christian
I don't think that google has religious beliefs.
-Why are zombies so poular
Because they are secretly brain washing you to be ready for the apocalypse.
-What is a short sale
The act of illegally trying to sell a leprechaun or midget.
-What is bmw select
A Russian online service that stands for Buy My Wife.
-What is credit
The ability to buy goods or services because they trust you enough to pay it back.
-What is diabetes
It is when your body is full of elves that constantly need sugar to stay alive.
-What is epilepsy
A neurological disorder usually marked by unconsciousness and seizures.
-What is fracking
A type of dirty dancing not allowed at school sponsored events.
-What is good credit score
When your credit (see above) is good.
-What is Huntington's disease
When you hunt to much, the animals rise up against the power and curse you with Huntington's Disease.
-What is incomplete dominance
When no one actually wears the pants in a relationship.
-What is java
Do you mean the reader or the coffee?
-What is kawasaki disease
Why do you care about all of these diseases?
We are changing the game!
It will now be "Why are"
-Why are leaves green
They are full of chlorophyll and chlorophorme
-Why are my ears hot
There are so my ways that answer could go.
-Why are nuts a heart a heart healthy food
This is just a crazy guess, but I'm going to guess because it's healthy and doesn't clog your cardiovascular system.
-Why are oxygen atoms neutral
Because they have the same number of protons as electrons.
-Why are prions unique
Can anyone actually answer what a "prion" is without googling it?
-Why are quakers called quakers
Because you should be "Quaking before the Lord!".
-Why are red pandas endangered
RED PANDAS ARE REAL!?!
-Why are sloths so slow
You try moving fast with arms like ham bones.
-Why are there no large arthropods
When the elephant sized mice created the universe, they were being persecuted by arthropods that were very large at that time so to punish them, the witch doctor mice decided to forever shrink them.
-Why are unions bad
When did anyone say ever say that unions were bad?
-Why are veins blue
They're not.
-Why are we alive
Why are you asking google for the meaning of life?
-Why are x rays dangerous
The government got the technology from the aliens and you should never trust that the aliens are looking out for our well being.
-Why are you a Christian
I don't think that google has religious beliefs.
-Why are zombies so poular
Because they are secretly brain washing you to be ready for the apocalypse.
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